closed door or open door?

I feel strange. So strange.

I remembered asking the Lord many times before with regards to closed doors and open doors and the Lord usually replies very promptly when the door is a closed door. I always tell the Lord, if the door is closed, please reveal it to me early so that I won't waste time on it! Like when I was looking for a job and sent out many resumes, I don't really want to waste time going for the interviews, so usually I will tell God to close the doors if it is not His will for me to be there. It's like right after I have prayed and asked God, the next moment, God opened my eyes and the truth is being revealed. Immediately, I usually will know God's answer if the door is closed. Usually it is pretty obvious. Like for interviews, I will not be asked for the interviews or like there was once at a bank, I specifically said that I do not wish to work on Sundays because of church and sabbath day, they specifically said the job requires me to do so. Obviously, I turned down the offer.

And when the door is closed, if I was not sure the first time round, I just have to pray a couple more times and then the answer will be quite apparent to me. Closed door.

This time round, it is pretty strange. I prayed again and asked God whether the door is close or open, and if it were not God's will, please close the door. The door remained open.

I am not sure, so I prayed again the second time. The door remained open.

I prayed a third time. The door remained open.

I prayed a fourth time. The door remained open.

This went on for 9 months. So in an ordinarily very human understanding, I made a guess that the door is open. Then suddenly the door closed. Why? Is God playing a trick with me? Did I hear wrongly from the Lord? Is this a test from the Lord? Did I ask the Lord too few times? If it were a closed door, why didn't God reveal it to me earlier? Why did God give me an answer that was seemingly open and which in actual fact closed? Why did God give me an ambiguous answer? Maybe God gave me an apparent answer, but I refused to acknowledge it? God could have given me another answer, which was wait, but why did God reveal something else? Strange. I do not have the answer. Should I pray and ask God again? Can God like give me more wisdom to understand and fathom what He is trying to tell me? How come God opened the door for a while and then slam it shut suddenly?
Many questions just raced through my mind at the same time. Unanswered.

I wish I had the wisdom to understand. I don't have the answers to many of the questions, but one thing I know for sure is that He has the best plan for me and though it is difficult to accept it when the door is closed, I accept. Thank you Lord. But please, next time, can you tell me earlier? Thanks.

dress for success

Gave a talk on "Dress for Success" at a Speechcraft Workshop organized by Buona Vista Toastmasters Club and received compliments from my club members as well as the participants. It was really enjoyable and I'm already thinking of doing a sequel to the talk.

I realised that this topic about Image and Personal Grooming is a huge topic and there are many areas to explore. Impressionistic Branding is an up and coming "IN" thing which is what differentiates anyone from everyone else and it should not be overlooked and taken for granted.

However, I realise that it takes 2 hands to clap and when it comes to dressing. People can be as stubborn as a mule! Well, the first criteria for dressing for success is that desire. If there is no desire to change, it can't work, no matter how many times I coach them.

And the other criteria for dressing for success is the eye for details. And my goodness, when it comes to colours, not everybody is gifted with differentiating colours with the slightest different in tone or texture. Well, can't help it for people who are born colour-blind. But worse, for people who are born with poor taste. I think that such things are really beyond me.

I remember one ex-colleague ever told me that she thinks that VPL is sexy. And my jaw just dropped, almost right to the floor. Well, for those who are uninitiated, VPL stands for "Visible Panty Line" and it is one of the top 10 image destroyers for ladies. And I'm surprised of the number of working ladies out there who are not aware what is VPL and happily walking around with one. And worse still, believe that it is sexy. Gosh. I really can't stomach that.

But then, if you observe people walking on the streets, which is one of the things I love to observe while I'm shopping, is that you will be amazed that there are people who wear the ugliest things in Orchard Road, which I believe must be their favourite pieces. People's taste do vary quite a lot! Then again, people appreciate art differently. And I must say, whoever came up with the phrase "Beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder" is a genius.

how far are you stretching your yardstick?

Some people think that my standards are very high when it comes to integrity. I don't agree with some people who find all sorts of excuses to lower the standards of integrity. Although sometimes, the defining line is a little grey, yet I think still the line must be drawn. What's the point of living with a huge grey area?

I once was having a discussion with a Christian brother with regards to gambling. Personally I feel that buying lottery tickets like 4D or Toto are considered gambling. And that person who argued with me said that he was in fact donating to charity when he buys lottery tickets and that he don't see why I should be so strict in classification. According to his exact words, he said I was inflexible.

Well, my take is always refer back to God's word - The Bible. According to God's standards, if a man looks lustfully at a woman, he had already committed adultery. God has very high standards when it comes to morals. So how is it possible that God's tolerance level can be compromised? Logically, God's standards are stricter than mine. How can one possibly use flexibility as an excuse when it comes to integrity? It is does not make much sense to me.

God is very clear. The gate to the heavens is narrow. Very narrow indeed.

So, my take is that you can compromise however you like. You can be as self-righteous as you like. When you compromise on your integrity, what else are you compromising with? Honesty with yourself?

My question is: How far are you stretching your yardstick?

our future generation woes

I was having supper with a friend of mine last night. As we chatted, I was telling her that I visited my alma mater NTU recently because there was a company roadshow there and that they were able to close cases on the spot. So that sparks the discussion on undergraduates are actually quite well-off nowadays to be able to afford to buy investments and insurance plans while they are still studying. Contrary to when I was studying, I had to supplement my school fees by tuitioning young children.

She totally agreed with me and the next piece of information she shared with me was a total shock. She said those rich students actually offered her $200 for each project work. And that she earned about $800 just by completing 4 such projects of similar titles by just editing and rearranging the sequence of the reports.

Such is the kind of attitude we have in our undergraduates now?
What is happening to our younger generation?
Do they understand the meaning of integrity?

I don't really see any hope in our future generations.

***

Just last weekend, I visited one of my colleagues at her place. I was pleasantly surprised that her son was very well-behaved and greeted me with grace by addressing me as "Che Che", which means big sister. I praised my colleague for great upbringing. I was sharing with her that the new generation kids don't greet adults the way we do when we were young. Kids nowadays are too busy with their PSPs, Nintendo DS, what have you to even acknowledge the adults around them. I believed that parents are the ones that made the difference.

ERP = Endless Repeated Payment

I am still on sabbatical leave, but I have to login to blog about this ridiculous issue after hearing the new ERP ruling on the news. Angry ah... They might as well put ERP system in the whole Singapore!!!

In the first place, did they even do a review whether ERP system works? If they have to extend the timings, apparently it didn't work! With ERP, the expressways are still jammed up during peak hours because everyone has to work, so everyone still has to use the expressways! Town areas are still jammed up because of heavy traffic.

Would the government rather have a quiet Orchard Road? I think they will have bigger problems if Orchard were deserted. If nobody goes to Orchard, then Singapore's economy would meet Doomsday and they are going to panic like hell and have to constantly promote to our neighbour Malaysia to have free shopping tours here.

Would people really detour if there is extended ERP hours just to save that 50 cents or a dollar? C'mon, I believe that a primary school kid can tell you the same reasoning. With increasing petrol prices, would detouring save 50 cents or use more? And does detouring mean no traffic jams? NO! If it were peak hours where everyone has to go to work, there is traffic jam everywhere. Let's face it.

The most ridiculous thing is that there is ERP system just before Braddell Road Exit in CTE during after working hours. I think that is simply ridiculous. Why must people staying up north pay the extra ERP?

It all does not make sense. In the first place, they use our taxpayers' money to build the expensive system to collect more tax. Wow. It takes a genious to think of that.

GST

Is GST (Goods and Services Tax) increase from 5% to 7% really affecting our lives?

Although this issue had been a discussion hype among bloggers way before it was implemented in July this year, I have not written anything about it. I wanted to make some observations before I rant. Now that it is almost the end of the month, I shall blog about some things I have observed.

Observation 1: Increase in parking fees due to GST increase taking effect from 1st July.

I saw this notice in the carpark next to the heartland shops near my place. This is a carpark that my parents and myself frequent as NTUC Fairprice and some of the banks are next to it. So naturally it is my family shopping area on weekends. The notice says "With effect from 1st July, due to the GST increase from 5% to 7%, parking fee on Sunday has been revised from $2.50 per day to $2.50 per hour."

Observation 2: Hawker Food Prices only increase a couple of cents?
If a ingenius genius wanted to make some quick bucks, he probably can start an IPO on Hawker Centres. Stock prices will definitely shoot sky high if launched on 30 June 2007.

Satay: 35 cents per stick. 50 cents per stick.
Fishball Noodle: $3.50 $4.00

Is GST really a mere 2% increase?

I will share with you some observations and I know you guys are smart enough to do the math yourselves. Go figure.

about plagarism

I was surprised and upset to read a blog post from another blog which looked exactly the same as one of my older posts. Exactly the same blog title, exactly the same sentence, exactly the same punctuation, exactly the same spacing. A cloned blog post.

I felt really really hurt that someone has copied my maiden creation without acknowledgement, word for word, punctuation by punctuation. Even the spacing and the paragraphing and the title. Even right down to the part where the lowercase was used on the blog title. Hey, that is the style I had created for my blog!

I would very much appreciate if the blog author could acknowledge me as the author and creator of that blog post and not use it and pass it off as his own works. Although I do not deny the fact that he might be feeling the exact same emotions that I went through. There are a few things that he could have and should have done. And here I would like to share with all of you.

Some learning points:

1. If he had wanted to use my maiden creation, he should have quoted the whole phrase by putting the phrase in "Quotation marks", acknowledge me as the author by writing "quoted from Idyllism" and put a hyperlink to my blog.

That is the way whenever you want to use a phrase or a sentence that you read somewhere, where you did not come up with the phrase yourself. It is only polite that you quote the original author everytime and always. This is to protect yourself. If you had copied from a website in which the author had registered a trademark or copyright, you would have infringed the copyright law and the person who owns the copyright can sue you.

Do not laugh because I had seen companies gone bankrupt after Streetdirectory.com sued them because ignorant web masters posted a copy of the map they happily downloaded from Streetdirectory.com on their company website.

2. He could have paraphrased the whole idea with his own words to express the same feeling. If it were paraphrased in anyway, it would not have been a clone. It would have become a totally different situation, just like twins can live merrily together. Something like a Coke vs Pepsi relationship or a Vitagen vs Yakult kind of relationship.

Just like when Rotiboy Bakeshoppe became famous, suddenly you discover somewhere in one corner springs a Roti-mom and another far corner springs a Roti-papa twin mushroom. When Bread Talk became famous, another that popped up was Cake History. Well, but the story is that they all live in harmony happily ever after.

loner? me? no way!

Today, while on MSN with Merv, he suddenly blurted a "Hmm... you're not the loner type?"

I think that's probably the most hilarious description of me, which is also the least accurate! I guess it is my independent image that I portray on my blog that gives this illusion. No I'm definitely not a loner. In the first place, I do not live on this planet alone, how to be a loner? Lol... Anyhow, thanks for providing me some blogging material nevertheless.

I would like to quote an interesting phrase from Merv. "Loneliness is what the world gives us. Companionship is what God gives us." It is not by choice that we are alone, but then we can choose to go out to make friends. Take time to care and concern for your close friends for they may be lonely too.

I guess it is human to experience loneliness. So, the next time anyone feels lonely, probably it is time to take out your handphone, scroll down your list of friends and give a tinkle to the friend that you have not contacted for a long time. Maybe your friend on the other end might be feeling the same.

My point is to stop focusing on oneself and start focusing on other people. Be a friend to someone today. Be a true friend. And not a friend in name only. Before it is too late.

comments link down

Blogger comments page is almost always down at around midnight every night and it's rather irritating to me cos this is my usual login time and only login time of the day. And I'm unable to comment on my friends' blogs and unable to reply to the comments on my blog.

Oh what a disappointment!

living dead

Why do some people choose to live in other people's shadows? Why are some people always afraid to be in the limelight? They rather hide behind the shadows. They rather blend into the crowds. They rather lead normal and boring lives. They have no dreams. They were not taught to have dreams. They never knew they could dream. Quietly, they came. And quietly, they go. Their lives are merely passing clouds.

I never can understand these people. Really.

I remember asking this new friend what she wanted in life. She had no answer to that question. I brought her to Adam Khoo's motivational seminar, in the hope that some life can be revived, some spark can be added to her life. I walked out of the seminar feeling high, positive, recharged with a lot of afterthoughts, with renewed passion for my career. But my new friend, she was indifferent after sitting through the 3-hour seminar. I asked her what she thought of the seminar. She said nothing. I asked her which part of the speech motivated her most. She was not even interested in my question. I was appalled.

How can someone be so indifferent, so unfeeling, so unemotional, so can't be bothered. How can someone have no goals in life? I don't mean to be rude, but that is as good as living dead. Live to die.

the 'paiseh' syndrome

Side note: Thanks to Barry for reminding me to practice what I preach.

In Singapore, there is this colloquial term and concept known as "paiseh" that is the typical trait of most Singaporeans. Pardon me for using the colloquial term. The odd thing is that there is no equivalent or exact translation in English. I guess this syndrome is probably alien to foreigners. For the benefit of those uninitiated, I shall attempt to translate it as best as possible to mean the anticipated feeling of embarrassment or shyness for fear of rejection or causing inconvenience to others.

This is a possible explanation and conclusion I came up with, while thinking about the possible scenarios that goes through the minds of the group of people I termed as "no-response people" in one of my previous post. I am no psychologist, so if you are one, please enlighten me on the reasoning behind this type of human Singaporean behaviour.

Somehow, I concluded with basic logical reasoning that Singaporeans are a bunch of nice-bies. They hate to reject people and they probably feel too "paiseh" to reject me and so, instead of saying a "no" to my face, they chose to pretend that they never did receive my email nor my smses nor my missed call. In this way, they feel better that they had the excuse of non-receipt of my invitation instead of feeling guilty for rejecting me.

I will be happy if anyone of you can prove my conclusion wrong.

sleepy but cannot sleep

I am the Organizing Chair for my club's International Speech and Table Topics Contest this year. The contest date is 2 days away and there are so many nitty gritty details to be taken care of. I thought I started organizing the event pretty early, but then again I was inexperienced. Most club contests are held during this period of time as the Area Contest dates were already fixed on 24th March. As such, I had immense difficulty getting the panel of judges as many experienced judges are fully booked during this period of time.

In order to let our club members to be able to take part as contestants, I had to look for external sources for appointment holders such as the Timers, Tally Counters and Sergeant-At-Arms. This poses some challenge in coordinating.

As expected, 2 appointment holders smsed me today to say that they were unable to make it. Contestants also smsed me to say that they have not enough time to prepare for the contest and they might pull out of the contest. It is not an easy job to be the Organizing Chair. I'm an organized person but the challenge comes when you need to work with disorganized people, irresponsible people and no-response people.

The worst is the last group of people called no-response people. I hate it when people ignore my calls, emails and smses. I'd appreciate a negative response much more than a non-response. Really. Whether the answer is an apologetic "Sorry I'm unable to attend" or a straight forward "No, I do not wish to take up the position because I do not like your face.", it is still a response. I very much appreciate an answer instead of leaving me hanging in mid air. With a rejection, I can look for alternative sources of help. Instead, some people simply love to leave me endlessly waiting for their non-response. So evil. I'd pardon those people who are old and forgetful. Maybe it is a genuine memory loss case. But with multiple missed calls, smses and emails. Hmm... I think I doubt memory loss is a good excuse anymore. Oh well, maybe some people just have the memory of a goldfish, then so be it. I have nothing to say. I think my hamster can do better.

***

Now I have so many things to do. But my mind is weary, body is exhausted, brain is fried. I just crave for my bed right now.

So, if you'd excuse me for a while, I think I will catch some winks before I sort out this mess.

shock

Received a call from mom at 6pm that my brother met with an accident and was admitted to the emergency ward of Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH). Immediately packed my bag, informed my branch manager and colleagues to leave urgently. My mom had been there since 12 noon and had yet to see my brother.

They only allowed one person to visit the patient at a time. My brother's girlfriend was the earliest to reach there and she had a tag to go in to visit my brother. Then my dad went. Then my brother's colleague came and they went in. When my dad and the colleague came out, the security cut off their tags and refused to allow anyone else to go in. My poor worried mom was waiting outside was refused by the guard to go into the emergency ward.

Since the only person who still had the tag on was my brother's girlfriend, she went to ask for the form to transfer my brother to the normal ward. However, the hospital staff stupidly refused to let her have the form as only the family members can take the form. But the problem is they refused to let my parents go in. How to get the form? Such is the kind of service we get from TTSH. Think the staff ought to bring their brains to work.

This went on ding-dong-ing to and fro for more than 6 hours!!! Such is the efficiency of the hospital that when I arrived, my dad was still waiting for the staff to do the paperwork. After the paperwork was done in half an hour, we had to wait for another 3 hours before my brother was transferred to the normal ward.

When my brother's ex-colleague Jason asked the receptionist counter of the hospital, they directed him to the normal ward and Jason went there to only find an empty bed. He had to make several calls to get to us. He went one big round to find us waiting outside the emergency ward. He waited with us for about an hour and had to go off for another appointment without seeing my brother.

The reason the hospital gave us was that they had not cleared the assigned bed. Why would any hospital take 3 hours to clear one bed? Simply ridiculous. To think that my brother was admitted at 10am this morning, his surgery completed around noon, he was only transferred to the normal ward at 9pm. How many hours is that?

***

My poor brother could not even recall how the accident happened or whether any vehicle hit his motorbike. By the time he regained his consciousness, he was already in the hospital. He had 6 stitches on his jaw, right hand with all bloodstained-fingers, left elbow, left shoulder, both knee caps bandaged.

His shirt and pants was tattered with blood stains, handed to us in a plastic bag by the hospital. His black leather shoes were badly scratched and torn. His favourite Kenji Yumamoto designer bag was full of blood stains. The face of his watch smashed.

We pieced the information together and imagined the impact. He must have flew off, hit his chin, supported the body weight with his hand and knees, spun off with the left shoulders torn upon abrasion with the ground, knocked out by the impact. This is the most serious accident that happened to my brother in his years of riding a bike.

I thank God he's alive and still breathing. He's still under observation in the hospital. He just went through a brain scan and X-ray to make sure he did not sustain any head injuries. I prayed for the Lord's healing hands upon my brother and prayed that there is no internal injuries, no injury to the spine or hip bone. Thank God there was no vomitting and he was still able to move his limbs.

I would like to thank all who have prayed for my brother and family. And especially to those who offered to visit my brother in the hospital. Really appreciate all your love and prayers.

I will keep you guys updated. Am going to the hospital again right after this post.

God bless everyone with safe journey on the road. Be extra careful when you drive or cross the road. Human beings are like glass, looks sturdy on the outside, but needs to be handled with care, for we are simply fragile.

dumb blondes

I always read dumb blonde jokes with an innocent mind, believing that dumb blondes do not really exists and that jokes are just jokes being exaggerating in nature, until tonight. After I caught a glimpse of The Simple Life: 'Til Death Do Us Part where Paris Hilton babysits 4 kids in real life, I cannot deny the fact that writers of dumb blonde jokes are truly painting a picture of reality. And reality hurts!

Just a few bimbotic scenes.

Kid: My teacher asked me to make a paper-maché.

Paris: What's that?

Kid: ...

Paris threw the whole paper-maché mix into the sink and tried to wash it down by squeezing dishwashing detergent into the sink. The result: a bad clog of course.

The show ended with Paris remarking that the kids were really tough to handle and that she was glad she only had dogs at home.

And I used to think that Paris Hilton looks gorgeous on magazine covers. What a shocking disappointment that there is lack of substance to substantiate such a beautiful packaging.

smellies exist

Why do I keep meeting jerks (and their female counterparts - b*tches) who are in the wrong and still want to turn around to accuse you? It is not my style to curse and swear. But damn, these people are everywhere. And I mean it. Don't believe me? Just turn around and you have one just right next to you. No? You will see his true colour when he/she farts. Just wait.

And you keep wondering how come this breed of disgusting people doesn't become extinct. Oh I almost forgot, since they exist in both sexes, I suppose they procreate with each other because they smell alike.

If you are waiting for these group of Smellies to apologize, you will be like an idiot waiting for the sun to rise from the same spot it set.

荒唐

我能原谅你的荒唐,

荒唐的是我没有办法遗忘...

revival of my hello kitty email

After my traumatic spam mail deleting activity yesterday, I've decided to dump my innocent account as I have better uses for that 1 year of my life. Disclaimer: This act does not mean I'm not innocent anymore.

When I login to my Hello Kitty Email, I'm totally pissed amazed to find that they have deleted ALL my emails as I did not login for more than 6 months. Wow, such initiative is rarely seen nowadays. Now that it is cleared, you can email me at jerlynn@hellokitty.com . No forwards please. Thanks.

DK, are you fainting yet? ;p

i hate spammers!

My innocent mailbox was bombed by spammers whom I highly suspect are terrorists sent by Al Qaeda. It wasted a hefty 30 minutes of my time doing so. This amounts to 15 hrs/mth and 7.5 days/yr and 1.08 yrs for my remaining lifetime (that's assuming I can live to a ripe old age of 80 which is a reasonable estimate as the average lifespan of a female is 88 years old).

And the most eerie part is that these terrorists have one common goal - to attempt to market and sell Viagra pills online. It never fails to amaze me how brainless terrorists can get. These no-brain-beings think that by spamming everyone's mailbox with 30 of the same email in different identities and email addresses, people will believe that Viagra pills are some elixir pills that can bring the dead alive? Gosh, perhaps these ignorant people do exists, or else these spam emails would not exist in the first place.

It never fails to keep me in awe the amount of faith these people place on Viagra pills. What an irony when compared to the little faith these people have in Lord Jesus - The Healer of all kinds of wierd diseases and sins.